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I am taking a break. We will talk in January.

Happy Holidays!

We failed you

Despite my calm demeanor and jovial attitude, there is a quiet rage inside of me. Today I found out someone murdered my friend. Someone shot him near his home and he died down the street at Duke Hospital. My friend, who has a wife, whose kids I taught in Sunday school. He is dead.

Of course I am grieved. Of course, my heart is broken. Beneath the grief and sadness of my heart, I am filled with rage. A rage which will only be calmed when neglect ends. A bullet brought an end to my friends life but our society killed him long before. This man's family lived in a part of town where property values are low and crime is high. A part of town where people come to help but seldom stay long enough to make a difference. The type of place that many of the kids I teach live. A part of town where politicians always mention but rarely visit. This part of town where people know to avoid at night. Somehow one of the most famous places in Durham is the most forsaken.

Then the whisper, "...when did we see you hungry or thirsty or a stranger or needing clothes or sick or in prison and did not help you?.. whatever you did for one of the least of these, you did for me." This scripture is a command to love others and improve their conditions, especially when these people cannot pay you back. Yet, we consistently make choices as Christians which do the opposite. Our indifference, which is an avoidance of confronting the reality within our cities,  maintains the conditions which get my friend murdered. Christians can be indifferent in this country because our focus is on personal holinness. An emphasis on individual piety inevitably leads to community neglect.

 Neglect is a pandemic, more lethal than any nuclear weapon, and responsible for the deaths of billions. It is responsible for the death of my friend. We neglect only the tasks and actions which are of minimal importance. However, I believe most of us neglect because we are waiting for a more opportune time. For example, I may set aside paying a bill until I receive my paycheck. When this logic is applied to the principles of justice and sacrificial love, impoverished communities and the vulnerable of our society suffer more poignantly. Their suffering experiences a temporary boon, due to our neglect. Regrettably, our politicians and the general populace have made choices to delay loving our neighbors as ourselves for centuries of domestic policy. Now in 2017, we have discarded our brothers and sisters for so long we do not even interpret our actions as neglect. We use other language to explain away the pangs of guilt which prick our conscious. 

Yes, I am angry. I have watched indifference pierce through our communities.  I am angry at the choices of my country. I am angry that we have witheld love from so many for so long. As a child I saw adults give reasons for their inaction. I felt the uncertainty of trying to make sense of Christian leaders abdicating responsibility for the suffering of my friends and their families. My feelings as a child have only increased as a man; except now I find myself with the same dilemma as those who have come before me. I have neglected loving my neighbor. I despair at my inadequacy but will not remain in a place of hopelessness. In Christ, I have the knowledge and power to work to spread the divine agenda of justice and sacrifical love to my community.

To my brother, I love you. I will miss you. I am working to eradicate the circumstances of our society which embloden men and women to murder their own. I cannot be angry with your murderer though. I know you would ask me to pray for them. So I will. You have shown me how to love God and love people within the brevity of our friendship. I will see you later F.M.

The Militant?

As I continue to write about black lives and our struggle, I feel a kinship with men and women who would be considered militant: Assata Shakur, Angela Davis, H. Rap Brown, Malcolm X, and Huey Newton. After deeper consideration, I refuse to identify or allow people to label me as militant. The militant label is inextricably tied with the word violent. Militant black people evoke images of armed black men and women marching in rank and file. This image is likely to increase the heartrate of most Americans.

Militancy as a label is inaccurate. To borrow archiac language, militant negroes existed in a time of widespread white extremism. Terrorism perpetrated by white families upon negroes is a common feature of my older relatives memories. What is worse, the police at times engaged in domestic terrorism. The Ku Kulx Klan, and other forms of organized white violence, had members who served in law enforcement. The police attacked and bludgeoned unarmed civilians for exercising their Constitutional rights. This violent behavior, sanctioned and embraced by white Americans, is militant. The modus operandi of black Americans to protect themselves and share their frustration is not a militant action. Their measures were an act of self-preservation, not militancy. White Americans and the United States government demonstrated militancy, by using armed forces to exile Native Americans and subject negroes to slavery. The false narrative of white Americans labeling black leadersas militant is an example of the pot calling the kettle black (pun intended). It is White Americans and the federal government who consistently demonstrated militancy towards every non-white individual.

There is great danger in the militant designation. Those whom are deemed as such become enemies to peace, trouble-makers, agitators, or threats. In this country, we eliminate threats. It is acceptable to kill militant people. Militant people are a threat to security and order. By labeling black leaders as militant, it allows the establishment to murder them. There is a reason why most of the black leaders I initially listed did not live to see old age, or live abroad. Few militant leaders, or revolutionaries, live to see their dreams come true in this nation. Instead of the establishment working to understand and address their legitimate grievances, the forces of white supremacy judge and execute them without due process. The amount of mystery and intrigue which shrouds several of the most prominent assasinations in the 1960s is both cause for concern, with regard to our criminal justice system, and a warning to all men and women who dare to reject injustice and bring about restoration for wrongs.

Here we are in 2017 and I almost fell for it! I almost embraced the militant label. This simple label is used to remove the legitimacy of an opinion. Militant people have subjective opinions, and in turn cannot be trusted. In a society which overvalues empiricism, and and thus objectivity, the militant or subjective individual cannot and will not be trusted. The militant label stole the influence from some of our greatest leaders, and for others it stole their life. In a brilliant and wicked move the oppressor casts their label onto the oppressed, further discrediting their cause. The duplicity and efficacy of this tactic, makes my stomach sick and also makes me want to applaud my enemy for their strategic brilliance. I am not militant, I am honest. I pray we would all have the courage to be honest, otherwise it will be difficult to address and remedy the evils of our past.

Different Rules

Growing up I went through a lot of jackets. From ages 6 to 13, I lost almost every jacket my parents bought me. It was not until a few years ago when someone corrected my narrative. They informed me I left a jacket behind and then someone stole my jacket. Theft...Larceny. All of these years I had experienced petty forms of criminal activity, aided by my forgetfulness. Until a few years ago, I did not view my disappearing outerwear as a crime but an unfortunate example of opportunism. I did not have a proper perspective of right and wrong.

For my fellow Americans who live in poverty, the rules are different. The absence of economic justice and lack of safety began to warp the minds of those condemened to these zipcodes. The mind has a fascinating way of normalizing sustained suffering. The ubiquitous stress debilitates internal resiliency, which results in the mind accepting the violent and dangerous circumstances as normal. To maintain sanity in this type of environment, morality must be reunderstood. Traditional values as they are traditonally understood can result in harm. For example, there is an idea that anyone can achieve their dreams through hardwork. Usually, this is a sound piece of wisdom. However, in a world full of stray bullets, dreams are stolen daily. Hardwork does not matter when someone can shoot you, for being in the wrong place at the wrong time. Our American values only function in a system that assumes safety. When individuals must work to ensure their survival, instead of it being a given, the value system breaks down. Much like chemical reactions, pressure alters the normal functioning of American ethics.

Seeing a child's conscience devolve into a fragmented psyche is a haunting feature of our inner citties. They are disciples of Nietzche in the purest sense. They have never read him but they live by his axiom "the will to power." They are godless because their world has abandoned them. To survive, strength is valued more than cooperation and power is worth killing for. Other people are viewed as potential threats instead of potential allies. Paranoia takes the place of compassion and life is valued only as much as one can profit from it. It is the epitome of social darwinism, and it is killing our country. Those who are strong enough to survive these conditions exit poverty and become a feel-good rags to riches story to entertain suburban America. Or these people survive and remain in poverty reproducing the values which kept them alive to the next generation. Both are examples of  social darwinism unfolding just a few blocks down.

Applying our normal standards of morality ignore the truth, their reality is fundamentally different therefore we must adjust our beliefs accordingly. When we condemn people who live in unsafe places for behaving like they are at war, our pride uncovers how little we really know about their circumstances, and how little we care to understand them. If we want behaviors to change, we must end the addage of "making the most out of a bad situation." How do you make the most out of a constant fear of death, unyielding hunger, and fluctuating access to electricity? Truly, How? Think about it... It is only by the grace of God that anyone makes it out of urban poverty; why leave it up to grace, when we can alter these conditions with a steady conserted effort? If Christians carry the Spirit of the living God in them, why do we settle for a stagnant love, which tolerates evil and avoids the truth? We cannot continue leveling judgement without understanding. Different rules require different mindsets, it is imperative that we learn both. Only then can we work with the collaboration necessary to build every American. Anything less continues a legacy of violence against the impoverished and it is their right to have better than what we have given.

To Protect and Serve

To protect and serve is the motto of numerous police forces in our country. Whom or What are the police protecting and serving? The knee-jerk answer is us, the citizens of the United States. Upon deeper reflection, their role in our society is not concerned with it’s citizens but the maintenance of a system.

In 25 years of life I have had 4 distinct interactions with the police. I have been followed home up to my driveway. I have been removed from my job. I have been removed from my neighborhood. I have almost been arrested. 3 of these 4 scenarios happened in a 3 year span before I was 18. Formerly, I felt anger and bitterness when I recalled these memories. I am certainly justified in feeling this way. While my frustration is legitimate, the actions of the police clearly demonstrate the goals and purposes of law enforcement. The police exist to enforce the laws of our country. Laws which exist to sequester black and brown Americans into poverty, incarceration, and socio-economic stagnation. If the police force is supposed to uphold these laws, then a significant portion of our populace is in a dangerous position.

This reality is why drastic measures must be taken to restore the wrongs of our nation’s history. Unjust legislation is a perennial and enduring feature of our self-proclaimed democracy. The police is a domestic military formed to ensure the social order remains the same. Despite the gains from civil rights legislation, the overwhelming majority of statutes are discriminatory, either actively or passively. The police are a reflection of American values. When police officers kill unarmed black and brown men at alarming rates, it is because we live in a society which deems their existence as optional. When domestic violence is a multi-generational epidemic in our nation, it is because the laws do not value the safety and comfort of women. Our police officers remain as guardians of a longstanding order, which values the acquisition of wealth for white men.

The police enforce more than a racist social order. They enforce and perpetuate attitudes. The legislators who formed most of our legal documentation held racist and misogynistic beliefs. These beliefs transferred into their legislation. New legislation came, but an over-emphasis of legal precedent created a way for new laws to reflect many of the older sentiments, racist ones. The progress made through legislative reforms is dwarfed by centuries of lawful hate and denigration. Celebrating the alleged progress we have made is more of an exercise in hubris than a factual appraisal of our modern conditions.

The police are not our friends, at least not for those outside of the American ideal. Our treatment is commensurate with the goals of this country. I am not excusing police brutality.  I agree with the outrage. There is considerable work to be done for the police to protect and serve every American. However,the police force is not failing. It is doing what it was intended to do. We as people of color, are demanding to be integrated and perceived as valued members of the nation, instead of intruders and enemies of the American dream. The police will not treat us well, until the legal landscape shifts. We cannot settle for topical solutions, we must engage the roots of the issue.

An American Tradition

"The price of hating other human beings is loving oneself less."
-Eldridge Cleaver

White supremacy is not an indictment against a particular individual, rather it is a function of an unjust government. The American revolution spawned a race-based class system. White people*  occupied the highest class. The remaining other humans of America with darker skin were sequestered into the lower-classes. African slaves were treated as less than human, and the newly United States government waged war on Native peoples. The new Americans justified their insidious behavior and unjust legislation through dehumanizing the Africans and native Americans. The dehumanization process is particularly damaging to the oppressor because they exalt themselves while disregarding the intrinsic value of different cultures. This is how white supremacy functions, it is a belief which exalts the values, beliefs, and practices of white people as the appropriate, or right, way of life. This ideology is unable to legitimize different cultures, only villianize them. White supremacy can only be believed if one simultaneously believes every other race is deficient. 

The belief in white superiority was both sub-conscious and explicit throughout the course of white civilization. These values framed the perspective of most of the British defectors. When they created the Constitution of the United States, they neglected to consider including Native peoples and kidnapped Africans. It would have been ludicrous for them to do so, because they believed in the supremacy of the white race. Non-white peoples were too stupid to understand, or to uncivilized to participate. This is the narrative of white supremacy. The legal structure of the United States favors white people because the creators believed in the superiority of white people. Every created system in this country is imbued with the belief of a superior white race, and as a result our systems maintain ineqality and inequity. 

In the southern United States, white supremacy is associated with white hoods and swastikas, however all of us are white supremacists to a degree, even people of color. Since the founders of the United States deliberately created a race based legal and political system, giving and denying certain liberties based upon skin color, the non-white Americans often do not even think of themselves as true Americans. This belief is a product of white supremacy. We do not feel we are true Americans because we are not white. We are keenly aware that we are a tolerated minority rather than a desirable part of the population. As a response to our lifetime of social ostracization, we try to fit in. We try to adopt different speech patterns in hopes of being accepted. We attend White Universities because a historically black college or university is not as academically rigorous. The tide of white supremacy has eroded our self-confidence and love for ourselves and each other. I see black men shave their faces clean, even though it gives them terrible razor bumps as a way to adopt a white standard. Black women constantly battle their hair because coming into work with a headscarf is unprofessional. It is not unprofessional for us, just for white people. Minorities in this country seek to adopt white standards with the hope that we will be fully accepted. Regrettably, that day never comes, unless you can lighten your skin enough to no longer be recognized as a hyphenated American.*

White supermacy is in all of us. The system we live in, intended to perpetuate white supremacy. As a result we live in a society filled with hate. We hate each other and we hate ourselves. White supremacy is limiting to white people as well. Any action, belief, or idea that departs from the longstanding tradition of white culture is viewed as foreign and ought to be removed. I hear white men tell me all the time how they cannot dance or jump, and use the phrase, "because I'm white" as an epithet to justify their lack of ability. I feel a surge of anger because dancing or jumping is a human activitiy! But since jumping and dancing is relegated to ethnic peoples in their conscious, they cannot participate in those basic actions. White supremacy truncates the personality of white people, it is an act of violence. In the deification of white conduct, harm is done to millions of white children who are told how they can and cannot behave due to their exalted status.

While non-profit organizations, governments, and businesses are investing a plethora of resources to alleviate poverty, this will not bring about equity. Our systems function to preserve the dominance of the white race. As long as these institutions continue to exist, so will the disparities between the races. The only solution is a restructuring of the system. White supremacy will die when we kill it. Our belief in an unfounded hope of things getting better is worthless. We cannot continue to make excuses in justifying an unfair system. Our delayed action continues to send a clear message to all people of color that their lives do not matter as much as their white counterparts. This is one tradition that is long due for replacement.


*The white upper class initially was initially reserved for anglo-saxons.  As new waves of immigrants entered the country, whiteness expanded to include: Irish, Italians, Germans, French, Spanish, and other light skinned Europeans.

*African-American, Chinese-American, Indian-American, Native-American, etc.

The Revolution is White

Thank-you for your support. Seeing the majority of my white peers respond positively to the protests of NFL players, helps to restore my belief in a country which elected an immature, thoughtless, and unqualified leader. This is the beginning. It is easy to lend a voice when the opinion you hold is a popular one. Are you willing to exchange your privilege so others can benefit? This exchange in privilege must be done collectively by the white majority. Are you all willing to oppose your parents and grandparents? How willing are you to receive correction from a person of color when they tell you personally about tour attitutudes, statements, and actions which are offensive? Are you ready to invest in black businesses? Are you willing to believe that having while you have one black friend, you may be wholly ignorant of black culture, or ignorant of who your friend truly is. A facebookpost, tweet, even this blof is meaningless if it does not compel thoughtful reflection followed by timely action.

The abolitionist movement existed concurrently with slavery.  Americans retained and honored their heinous institution so much that it took until 1865 for thoughtful reflection to turn into timely action. White Americans, you cannot simply believe things will get better. I am willing to wager, when a host of Latin American countries achieved liberation from their imperial centers they believed things would improve for them. Some of them have achieved freedom and self-sufficiency but others are failed states struggling to create stability. Progress is not a given. Our belief in progress removes the responsibility from our fellow citizens to enact change. We leave change to chance, a mistake with grave implications for all of us.

This criticism and call to action is leveled at white people because you have made a country in your image. Your community has resisted expanding privilege to those outside of your preference, and maintained unjust legislation. You shaped this country, and you may adjust it accordingly. The change black and brown people yearn for hinges upon your consent. The revolution is white. True revolution does not happen until the upper class invloves themselves.The poor have revolted from time to time throughout the course of history. Usually their rebellions are short lived and the revolutionaries pay with their lives. Revolution is fully realized when the upper class chooses to take up the cause of the poor, or choose their own agenda due to their disenchantment with current conditions. White America, our revolution is your revolution. I am not saying that minority communities cannot create change. Surely they can and have done so. What I am arguing is, when it comes to a reorganization and restructuring of social and economic policy, minorities cannot simply will this type of change into power without the consent of the ruling class. In our country, the ruling class is white. White America, our freedom is contingent upon your agreement, as it has always unfortunately been.What will you all choose to do?

These broken systems will not be fixed with our beliefs, only with our actions. Search God, search your heart, search your friends and families. We will achieve justice through actions supported by a firm conviction in the equal value of every human being. We are not here yet. If we want to move forward, we must forge our progress out of our love for one another, instead of a weak belief.in imminent advancement.

"Where your treasure is, so your heart will be."

I read an article a few days ago which explained the chasm between white wealth and black wealth in the United States. The wealth gap is the same as it was 50 years ago. For every $100 of wealth gained by white families, black families gain about $5 in wealth. This disparity in wealth is dreafully unacceptable. I laughed out loud in disbelief as I read the statistic. This statistic is cruelly ironic. As America continues to believe in a narrowing of income disparity, the reality is antithetical. The American belief in racial progress is a belief measured in feelings not dollars. While black people continue to struggle to exist in this country, white America feels like progress is being made. 

Subsidies. Numerous industries are subsidized by the government. Farmers are one of the more famous group for their government subsidies. Corporations use lobbyists to exchange money and determine legislation in an act of legal bribery. The government invests in these industries for the good of our domestic and global economy. With every county which fawns over businesses, wining and dining them to build a plant in their city, the black community, numb from repeated disappointments, simply shakes their heads and gets back to work. Can you imagine how frustrating it is to work multiple jobs and barely have the ability to cover basic living expenses? Meanwhile the taxes you paid to your elected officials dispense millions and billions of dollars in exclusive private enterprise and military adventures. Our government reluctantly covers children's healthcare, but our government willingly spends millions on new stadiums!? Why? 

Return on Investment. Black people are literally viewed as a bad investment. I have no reason to believe anything different. Welfare, the most iconic government subsidy, is aid. Aid is given freely to help those in need to survive, never for them to thrive, and is rarely expected to be repaid. An investment is expected to yield a return. We are citizens of a government that does not see us as worth their time or money, the two components of investment. Programs which are critical in building our children and investing in our communities like: headstart, before and after-school programs, and early literacy programs are the first items cut in times of alleged financial constraint. It is not hard to imagine the undercurrent of hopelessness and futitility which nestles in our thoughts, actions, and choices. For generations the black community beleives, through repeated observations and personal experience, the government sworn to protect and help us, has no significant interest in improving our lives. It is clearly evident that the Federal government's money is not with us, so their heart remains absent, like so many of our fathers. 

Flag Revelations

The debate about the symbolism of the Confederate Flag reflects is a prodcut of the historical ambiguity of the Civil War. The Confederate flag was used by the Confederacy. The Union forces defeated the Confederacy. What happened to the leaders of the failed coup d'etat? Robert E. Lee retired and died of old age. Jefferson Davis retired and died of old age. The General of the Confederate army and President of the Confderacy were not treated as traitors of democracy but as discharged combatants, and arguably as war heroes. When the leaders of treason are left to suffer the pangs of their conscience rather than justice for their crimes, what is a southerner to make of that? In showing grace to those who actively worked to destroy the Union, we failed to repudiate the act of secession. The United States neglected to provide punishment commensurate with the actions of the rebels, and Southerneres were allowed to rebuild their society with racism and terrorism. In a broad sense, the southern way of life remained unchanged, which can be interpreted as a type of victory. Humans are motivated by rewards for pro-social behaviors and penalties for anti-social behaviors. The penalties leveled against the rebellion and it's leaders are grossly disproportionate in relation to the destruction they wrought and the evils they sought to maintain. 

More than 150 years after a clear Union victory, there are large portions of Americans who revere a flag of treason and rebellion as a symbol for southern pride. A southern pride which would have me in shackles. I find it difficult to convince my fellow Americans and Southerners to adopt my position when the reconstruction period is still underway. History books place a clear end for Reconstruction but voting rights for African-Americans still lag in southern states. African-Americans are still discriminated within financial institutions. The sharecropping system which kept African-Americans in economic bondage, has been replaced with low-wage jobs and shameful public housing. Non-profit organizations are fighting to bring a true end to the Reconstruction era. 

The Union failed to dispence justice to it's enemies. As a result our nation never healed priperly. We continue to remain divided because we chose to be silent about injustice. We preferred to create legends and heroic narratives of our past rather than telling the truth. 

With Love

"...the white moderate, who is more devoted to 'order' than to justice; who prefers a negative peace which is the absence of tension to a positive peace which is the presence of justice"
Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. from his Letter from the Birmingham Jail

These words from 1963 bring fresh perspective to our current times.  The broadscale white culture appears to have a commitment and dispositon towards this negative type of peace. Maintaining a negative peace comes through the consistent practice of conflict avoidance. Tension cannot exist as long as conflict is avoided. The absence of tension demonstrates a rejection of truth. Communities which avoid conflict refuse truth due to the polarizing nature of truth. Truth is either accepted or rejected and leaves each individual a choice. I think at the core of humanity we are all averse to conflict. However, within black society, saturated by conflict, both historically and currently, it is ludicrous to expect a conflict free existence. For many African-Americans, there is a choice to surrender to the pressures of being black in this country, or actively combat the tension, which comes with our existence in a nation made by us but not for us. 

I do not believe oreder and justice are mutually exclusive. In this current established order there is neither order nor justice. Where is the order in ghettos? Where is the justice when families are ripped a apart due to the xenophobia of neighbors and our elected officials? Order and justice are illusions, believed only by the wealthy. Ask the poor, suffering, and discarded their perspective on order and justice. They know better than most the soul of America.

I believe and pray that white America will become more concerned with justice than order or loyalty. From the first African forced upon a transatlantic vessel until the 1970s, white people, first white colonists and later white americans, performed, legalized, and justified some of the most heinous crimes against my ancestors. The mixed blood in my veins is the evidence of just one such atrocity. There are grandfathers, aunts, uncles, cousins, and parents who have been a part of lynch mobs, covered up assassinations, and acquited murderers in the court of law. Rather than openly condemn their families for their actions, they make excuses, or worse keep it a family secret. For all of the backlash black Americans receive for our non-cooperation with the law, white Americans have done it for longer and more effectively. 

For the white American Christian I am especially grieved. We share a Savior and Redeemer but you will not share in my suffering. Our brotherhood and familial ties will reach an apex as you choose your comfort instead of working towards my liberation. 

I have spoken to numerous white friends and shared the burden I carry in my black skin. I explained the emotional scars etched in my conscious for being born a few shades to dark in the wrong country. They hear my stories and are moved to explore the issue more or broaden their perspective. What I yearn for is the day my white brothers and sisters drop to their knees in prayer and allow our Counselor to guide them into proper recourse. As I have fought through tears to believe I am made in the image of God, I wait in deep expectation for the Holy Spirit to shape away the superiority and apathy that remains in the hearts of my brothers and sisters. 

Unfortunately, far too often my white friends sink into self-pity, guilt, and paralysis. They experience sorrow and respond as if they are the source of their salvation. They aim all of their pain and guilt onto themselves. Rather than continue to wound themselves with personal and ancestral guilt, the cause of justice become an intellecutal pursuit instead of a God-given conviction. So many of my friends explore the topic of racial reconciliation instead of living to bring about racial justice. For true reconciliation to occur, justice must accompany it. The presence of justice to those held in bondage is a form of love sorely absent in this country. 

Friends, the guilt you feel from your inaction, apathy, and participation in racism is what God desires from you. Christ died so we can have relationship with God the Father. Let us not waste that gift in an effort to preserve the facade of order, justice, and personal goodness. Until this happens we will never have the relationship God intended for us to have, which is a great loss for us all. 

Lovers and Laws

"A law is unjust if it inflicted on a minority that, as a result of being denied the right to vote, had no part in enacting or devising the law."
Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. Letter from the Birmingham Jail

What if we black Americans quit paying taxes?

When the British colonists were mistreated by the crown and denied certain privileges as tax-paying citizens, they refused to pay taxes. Taxes are the governments compensation for the services they provide. Unfortunately in the United States, the quality of these services oscillates depending on the skin color of the citizen. We as black Americans continue to receive a sub-standard package of American liberties, despite the labor and life we have placed in American soil. Our elected officials rest on the accomplishments of 50 year old legislation. Our police force cannot distinguish whether we are worth protiecting or destroying. Government subsidized housing is a prison in waiting. Welfare payments help in maintaining poverty rather than eliminating it. The government has not done it's due diligence in protecting black citizens, or conferring and maintaining the rights we were to receive upon our inclusion into the citizenry.  We are long overdue in receiving the full measure of our rights. If we continue to be treated as less than citizens, then it is reasonable to respond accordingly.

Paying taxes is one example of a number of laws we would be within our conscience to break. Black Americans put our bodies and blood into building this country but were absent during the discussions on creating a new polity. Black Americans were not invited as a special interest group to review the Constitution upon it's signing. I shudder to think of the cruel irony felt by slaves upon hearing existence of a Declaration of Independence and learning that their bonds would remain. For almost 100 years those bonds remained until the President Lincoln freed the southern slaves.While I am grateful for the liberty my ancestors recieved, they were freed into yet another foreign world, struggling to become fluent in capitalism and politics when days earlier it was illegal for them to be able to read. The legal and financial framework of this nation  preceded the Emancipation Proclamation. A class of thousands of new citizens with no education flooded the workforce with nothing more than a desire to make things better for their children. Despite these derelict beginnings, black people learned to survive and eventually thrive until it became en vogue to demean us, terrorize us, and treat us like animals once again. This country was not made for us. We continue to try to be a part of it, but like a scorned lover we continue to be rejected. What will it take for us to be accepted as Americans?

A Place Where I belong Pt. 2

Time did what time always does, it moved on. The murder of my family passed and I was seamlessly pressed into slavery. The leather collar which has become natural to me, was given to mark my new place in society. They broke me, they broke all of us. We walked barefoot on concrete roads through the summer, until we left behind footprints with our own blood. We were worked for hours during the heat of the day. The elderly and children were fortunate in their frailty, their weakness liberated them first.
The meaningless labor did not create suffering for me. The agony of back-breaking work helped to reinforce my existence. My suffering affirmed my being. When I ended my thoughts of freedom, a deluge of new ideas flooded my consciousness. I observed a wicked facet of humanity. What disturbed me, as a slave, was watching everyone else operate like nothing had happened. No one inquired of my background or family. I was not hidden. I was not relegated to a field where no one could see me. I was not held in a shack. I interacted with society, but had no more sentience then a sack of grain.

Jokes aside

When are we going to take poverty seriously in our country? The statistics are appalling. Have you ever been to our poor communities? Whether urban or rural, there is a lack of hope. The question which starts early and grows within a young mind, “what is the point?” This lingering question, if unanswered drains the child of purpose. Hopelessness is a parasite, it devours the life of the host and spreads faster than policy can be created. Poverty is the oldest institution within the United States. It seems as if we have embraced the destitute as a natural byproduct of our free market. We treat the poor as an unfortunate but ultimately unavoidable reality of our economic system. This type of thinking is exactly the type of thinking which focuses resources on palliative care rather than a systemic restructuring. As long as we have organizations and programs dedicated to poverty relief, we passively agree to keep poverty in our society. When are we going to get serious?

Have you ever been to your cities public housing? Have you ever walked around the cracked sidewalks? Have you seen the dirt plots? Have you seen bare clotheslines and cheap plastic toys left out as if the owners were raptured? Have you ever seen a man with sunken eyes and skin that hangs loose from his skeletal frame? Children are the ones who must make sense of this world. These children grow up having to reconcile the constant dichotomy of their existence. On one hand they are in one of the safest nations in the world, but they must sleep on the floor to avoid the possibility of bullets in their bedroom. They are bombarded with propaganda at school which tells them they can be whatever they want. Then they get off the bus from school and are solicited by gangs to join or face violence. Do you know how much they run? Not as a game, but to preserve their bodies. These children are not safe. Yet, we pretend as if it is not they are. I teach students who have already been shot. I teach students who are almost seemingly devoid of empathy, out of necessity, to remain sane in a violent and apathetic world. Our children are disillusioned with the American system because they are the discarded. They know if they do not take responsibility for their safety and wellbeing, no one else will. When are we going to get serious?

Rural poverty is simply a different accent of the same language. Social mobility is a fable. They have three legal options: keep doing what your parents have done for generations, work 30 years to secure a middle management position from a service sector job, or find any number of odd jobs to make ends ad infinitum. These options barely require a high-school diploma. Why invest in education when you’ve watched your future in your parents? Leaving is an option but what about the people you know will stay? Do you give them up in order to succeed, especially when family is the backbone of the community? Children should not have to choose between their family or the possibility of a more fulfilling existence. The options are not good enough. When are we going to get serious?

This is a snapshot. This is a cry for decency, an appeal to those in power, change this system! Measures that alleviate poverty but are not working towards eliminating poverty are wasted efforts. We need to be the role models our children deserve.

Poison

Carbon monoxide is flammable and lethal, yet we breathe it in constantly. From parking lots to campfires we expose ourselves to a deadly substance. White supremacy is all around us. It's in our restaurants and universities, affirming and celebrating white citizens, while slowly debilitating the resiliency of non-white Americans. As a result, the darker Americans, gather at HBCUs, Quinceaneras, mosques, and churches to celebrate our humanity. Despite the effects of the poision of white supremacy, we get advanced degrees and build wealth as an effort to normalize non-white success and re-establish our humanity. However, for us to thrive in a system meant to advantage white citizens means the system is failing. Steps to equity for us are accurately interpreted as a deconsolidation of power from white citizens, igniting the hearts of Dylan Roof and James Fields Jr. We should condemn their actions and all of the violence perpetrated against browner skinned humans in this country. We, the mass citizenry, are also culpable. We have pursued comfort more than justice. We have loved ourselves more than others. We have tried to make the most of a system which clearly advantages one group over another, rather than calling for it's removal. White supremacy is in all of us, how will we respond?

"The Dilemma of Success"

Being a man in America gives me access to power.
Being a black man in America gives me unwanted fear.
People fear me, and I fear them, so I meet strangers and encounter danger.
When black men are seen as threats America gets trigger happy.
I keep history in mind and make myself more palatable, more family friendly, more WHITE.
So I exchange slang for language more tame, leaving a bitter aftertaste.
Selling myself for limited success.
Unless, you spend your life making change through entertaining the lighter shade.
Wearing jerseys, telling stories, making millions.
And if you're great, they'll tell your story.
Glory can be yours.

But.
If I don't make it in entertainment, what's left for me?
Being in an office where I'm hired for diversity?
Why aspire to be profiled by clients, and misunderstood by colleagues?
I don't need a degree to be an outcast.
Corporate America wants my color not my culture.
So hoop dreams are my way of combining dignity and wealth, authenticity and occupation, self-respect and self-determination.
Making it big in a sport, in music, or on the screen is a one in a million chance.
Working a 9-5 for several decades, where I'm tolerated rather than embraced, is an everyday torment.
With broken dreams from my childhood and unmet expectations in my present, I pray the future holds a third option for me.

"A Place Where I Belong Pt. 1"

I had a dream once.
My family went on vacation and we went to an outdoor mall to eat. After finishing a meal at our favorite restuarant chain, we walked to our cars laughing about past and present misfortunes. Children sprinted through the wide walkways despite the pleas of exhausted parents. Teenage romance bloomed among the shadows of light posts. I felt content in the presence of family and the company of strangers.
We loaded into 3 black Chevy Tahoe SUVs. I entered the first vehicle and leaned against the cloth seats feeling deeply satisfied. We sat in the vehicle as our driver manuevered the car through the congested parking lot. The flashes of brake lights interrupted our conversation and laughter until the sounds of gunshots muted my family. I covered my eyes from shattering windows and flashes of light. The smell of gasoline and smoke nauseated me. In the crevice between the driver's seat and my bullet ridden chair, I did not notice the quiet. I did not notice all the screams were outside of the car, and there was only one sound inside the car, stillness. The type of stillness which only exists without life. I did not need to see their bodies, the silence told me all I needed to know.
I felt pressure around my shirt collar. They dragged me through jagged glass and puddles of blood out of the black Chevrolet. Black masks shouted commands. Semi-Autmotaic rifles enforced compliance. Between my cries and curses, I knelt in front of the porous vehicle. With knees scraped from bits of glass and the texture of the pavement, I voiced my despair. I wailed as they tied my hands and feet together. I howled my sorrow until the captors took pity on me and used a rifle butt to ease my suffering. With a freshly cracked skull and shattered family, I emptied my grief onto the pavement and hoped I would never wake up again.

Like father like son

White man's religion. I've heard this phrase used by opponents of Christianity and at face value this pejorative is inaccurate. I realize I may have missed the point of the specious claim though. Perhaps white man's religion does not describe the origin of Christianity, rather it describes how it has been weaponized by white society at large. Throughout the study of the formation of the modern world, it is clear to recognize the effect European empires had on the lands of Africa, Asia, and the Americas. They stole-property, they stole people, they stole resources. These villains were Christians. Christian Europeans violated the commands of justice and self-lessness to create a new world order with themselves at the top. Christians took existing racism and classism and codified it into law, which still has implications on the hemispherial disparities of wealth today. Christians used their hope of glory to force God's creation into perpetual submission.

I received a letter from an acquaintance about supporting him and his family as a missionary to an African country. I lived as a missionary to the college campus for 2 years, so I understand and empathize with his position. When I consider he (an American) is going there to make disciples (Christianize the heathen) of African and Asian citizens, it has an eery reminder of the historical record. I struggle to find reasons to contribute to a religion, which has been used to perpetuate inequality. I think justice for the decolonized nations would strengthen the message of the Jesus, because justice is the message of Jesus. Where does that leave me? I recognize in my own practice and beliefs, I have embraced Christianity to the point where I desire to control people and delay justice. The syncretism of white man's religion warped my thinking, and countless other Christians, to uphold domination, and delay restoration for the sake of order and security. No matter how illegitimate I may be, my thinking is not all that different from the American patriarchs. Like father like son indeed.

Just War

Each day of school brought about the same ritual. Within the first 15 minutes of school, from 1996-2009, I pledged my allegiance to the United States. Monday through Friday, regardless of weather or my temperament, I gave an oath of loyalty to my home country. I want to bring attention to the final three words of the pledge, "justice...for...all." Year after year these final three words spoken with candor and naivety, as only a child can do, fermented into cynicism. This phrase reminds me of the incongruency of the word and deed of the United States. How long have black people, Americans, before me recited this empty promise? I am generations removed from them, yet I am meandering through the same paradoxical experience. When will we all receive justice? The only consequence the murderer of Philando Castile received is to live with the variable amount of guilt his conscious will provide. Despite attempts at reconciliation, the prior step of justice remains to be seen. The United States government contirbuted to creating false narratives of extremism, on behalf of patriotism, emboldening (at least to some degree) jingoistic men to murder in the cause of national secuirty, which is a characterisitc of war. America in veiled attempts wages war on my people and the soldiers who carry out murder are seldom convicted of any wrongdoing. The list of black causalties continues to increase, from active violence and passive neglect. The war is real and if this country remains as it has been, more of my people will join the fraternity of American martyrdom. There is no justice...just war.

Dissonance

I thought success was harmless. All of my dreams of a family, a life of service to my community and my God were supposed to help others and bring satisfaction to my life. I am realizing it is not that simple. Success is an act of violence. With each ascent of my professional career, I delve further into foreign spaces...hostile spaces. Each promotion comes with an insidious command, ingest more of white culture. Lose your slang, shave your face, trade dap for a firm handshake. Actions, thoughts, and ways of meaning which I hold so dear are forced beneath the surface, all so I can appear more "professional." If I climb the social ladder, I do so at the expense of my own soul. Success is violent.

Even if I continue to manage the tension of my deep love for black culture against the tide of white supremacy, I am still living in a society which does not value my contribution to it as an equal cultural participant. My hyphenated identity, which was given not chosen, is evident of my sub-par standing. "I too am America." For all of the black billionaires, and millionaires, there are millions more black peope living and believing in poverty. I cannot succeed as long as this is true. To succeed in this system is to validate it's existence, and to fail in this system achieves the same goal.What options remain?

Beneath the surface

Assuming equity is what we want...the way to reach equity is to expand privilege to include the powerless, not to invalidate or remove privilege from those in power. I do not want to live in a world where people demand poltically correct speech at the expense of cultural authenticity. I recognize there are numerous divergent views, many of which I would find offensive, but eliminating the speech does not improve the condition of the country. If my culture is offensive, then we can have a conversation to deepen our understanding of one another. I hope that we are not so insecure as to eliminate authentic speech. If I change my language because of social pressure, but not because of my love for my neighbor it is fruitless. I hope my neighbor is confident enough to assume best intentions and share their feelings, rather than demand the adoption of language and practices, without considering my divergent opinions. Unfortunately I think fragility and conflict avoidance is steering our country into an ethical ambiguity where those with wealth have the influence to shape behavioral standards. This frightens me. No group should have a monopoly on human conduct.

What our country continues to do is force unity through legislation, no matter how beneficial, and political correctness. Pieces of sympathetic laws are glued together with the blood of American made martyrs. As a result, we maintain a weak forced peace.  We are skipping steps. Our identities: sexuality, gender, sex, and race (amongst others) place us into a system of advantages and disadvantages. We are doing our fellow citizens a disservice by striving towards an ideal where the components of ourselves are independent of our future well-being and success, without acknowledging and replacing the biased systems which harm us, with equitable ones which support us. We must advance through honesty. Our country must start with truth, and until we do, we will remain broken.

"Return of the Confederacy"

Drugs rule, pushers, and fiends rise and fall like the sun but the streets stay hot because these men of steel stay packing heat.

Having to be Supermen from DC to Chicago to survive.

Little girls are dodging uncle's gazing at their thighs while running right into drive bys.

Innocent blood and tears are the only things which escape.

This is no America.

This is Incorporated chaos.

Zip codes cage citizens into poverty and poor education.

Neither weather nor the non-profit sector can erode these prisons.

No investment, so commerce is done with bodies as currency.  

Spare change and the dead both lie in the street when they cease to be useful.

This is no America.

A corrupt world corrupts values.

Trauma is replaced with triumph.

Why be afraid of dying when you can have the power to kill?

Replacing fear with force.

People question how a community could destroy itself?

The destruction happened with slavery, was codified through segregation, and whatever was left burned down from broken crack pipes and broken promises.

You can still smell the smoke.

Maybe our communities are a new Confederacy?

America already declared war on us once, or twice, or nevermind...we’ll just keep track on the backs of our ancestors. 

Deficit Spending

Advertising is a highly lucrative profession. In a world governed by the accumulation of wealth, demonstrating and convincing people to buy a product or service is a natural output. In a scoiety influenced with this philosophy we see brands. I am told what I need, what I should want, ad infinitum. I have needs but my perception of them is hazy. I need water to survive but I believe Fiji is more indicative of a lifestyle I want, compared to water from the tap. Arbitrary...My understanding is influenced by my own insecurity. I want to purchase expensive goods to make up for what I do not possess. If I can own the highest quality in one area of my life, then I must be a high quality person. America has become saturated with capitalism, to the point we ascribe people's self-worth to the quality and quantity of goods they possess. When I see a homeless person, destitute, lacking popular brands, I scorn them. When I see individuals with Ralph Lauren, Merceedes Benz, and Luis Vuitton I gravitate towards them. I aspire to a higher lifestyle but I have more in common with the homeless. We are both left wanting for more, looking for a form of security. If I truly believed in my inherent worth as a human, I would purchase specific brands incidentally or purely due to my personal aesthetical preference. This cruel irony plays out in families across this nation every day, "I spend because I lack. I lack because I spend."

Silent Stones

Statues...dead, immobile, statues. The debate is whether we should remove the statues of confederate soldiers and obelisks of known racists. These monuments intend to celebrate, honor, or remember the past. I don't need a reminder about the past, in part because the past involves slavery. I live in a society which won't let me move past race based identity. I have to identify myself as black on forms throughout my life, knowing it's both inaccurate information, and I'm giving up my ability to be perceived as I choose. The condition or placement of a monument means nothing to me, if the system which created these monuments exists. At UNC-Chapel Hill there is a statue of a confederate soldier on the campus. There are individuals and groups who want to see the statue removed, and  there are others who wish for the statue to remain...What is the true relevance of the conversation though? I work in east Durham roughly 15miles down the road. The students I teach have to negotiate their safety daily. This year alone, I had 1 student get shot, and another student and his family survived a drive-by. Meanwhile, individuals in business casual sitting in outdated furniture debate about statues. Statues...which don't divest funds from public education. Statues, which don't provide after school alternatives to create positive opportunities for children. Statues, which remove healthcare coverage from my students. Statues, which deport students back to their "home" country. These statues are silent, while our leaders are deaf to the cries of my students. It is a privilege to debate edifice placement when the conditions of the formerly oppressed remain steadfast.

The Melting Pot

The United States is often referred to as a melting pot. This metaphor intends to portray the shift from a heterogenous society to a more homogenized one, specifically in terms of race and ethnicity. The American ethos is both apple pie and sesame chicken, Spanish and English, Islam and Christianity. The influx of immigrants to this nation creates a manifold cultural identity, at least that is how we praise ourselves. The truth is that for centuries American identity is defined in terms of an acceptance and perpetuation of white cultural norms, particularly anglo-saxon ones, reflecting our status as a former British colony. The melting pot is not creating a unique multi-layered ethnic identity but a furnace of white ideology; the impurities rise to the surface to be discarded, leaving behind a pure white culture. The customs and ways of life from other cultures are viewed as exotic, deviant, interesting, strange, but never American (no matter how long one's ancestors have been here). The aspects of one's native culture will eventually be discarded, or relegated to secret spaces hidden from the public, to fully participate in the rights and privileges of an American. We see generation after generation of immigrant adopt more white American customs and less of their family heritage. I don't even know my family history because my native customs were whipped out of my people and discarded. Their strength and humanity discarded by slave owners in favor of a more palatable version,  niggers...not men, women, mothers, brothers. Niggers...who knew their place in this society. My racial identity was both stripped and given by the melting pot of America. I feel the heat of the crucible every day, the pressure to conform, but this melting pot only serves to harden my resolve.

A Man's World

Usually, I am proud to be an American. Unfortunately, I am not often proud to be an American, man. This country alleges to be a land of liberty and life. The realities of disparities between the two sexes is an ever-present blight in this country. Wages are vastly unequal, and simply put, this country does not consider the needs of more than half the populace. Despite the overarching culture of male centered life, what concerns me the most is the violence against women. Sexual assault and rape are a natural part of ur culture, with the overwhelming majority of male perpetrators and female victims. These facts are not unique to the United States but several countries. What is the cause of this sex based violence? Is there something inherent about the fabric of this society? Are men implicitly violent? As an American I am deeply troubled. As a man, I am disappointed for not exercising my agency more. It's a man's world and this man's world is killing our women.

The 3rd Party

Political parties exist to gather individuals under a common set of principles. A collection of indivuals often has more ability to influence the political process than a sole person. In the United States we are bi-partisan, with third parties having minimal influence overall. However, our Democratic and Republican monikers obscure the party with more leverage and more members...The Capitalist party. I could never vote for the Capitalist party but their presence is ubiquitous. Capitalism is a system which is deeply intertwined in American culture. The idea of private enterprise to acquire wealth is benign in principle. In reality, this system is more concerned with profit margins than the welfare of it's citizens, causing and sustaining poverty and injustice predating the Americn revolution. With focus on Democrat and Republican conflict, our eyes miss the true culprit of inequality. America is sick from the unrestrained pursuit of wealth, at the expense of people's life, liberty, and pursuit of happiness. We must shift our focus from balanced budgets, return on investment, and consecutive quarters in the black to eradicating poverty in our communities. Greed has our nation in a vice-grip, and we justify our selfishness in the name of self-preservation, or financial security. Let's be honest and examine our motivations. Capitalism is not an evil we should exorcise but our ancestors have done shameful things in it's name. Will we follow, adding more casualties to the millions of people destroyed by it? Or will we use it to heal and build our nation?

Hail Mary

My wife is black and so am I. In the midst of dating we confessed we were not sure we would marry a black person. We both had our reasons for why we thought so. My reason, I was acculturated. I had paradigms of beauty that I didn't know existed. Let me explain.

As the summer nears, wedding season is upon us. I find myself getting invited to far less weddings then some of my white friends. There are a myriad of factors that contribute to being invited to a wedding, but I cannot shake what I see, at an anecdotal level. My black friends are not getting married. Beautiful black women and thoughtful black men wander for companionship, looking but not finding. Love is difficult to find, if one believes in the sort of thing. The disparities in marriage seem innocuous enough. It is easy to justify the negative trend in marriage due to divorce rates, and millennials deviation from the idyllic life of their parents. If I think more deeply, my sample size is focused within a Christian context. My Christian context is de facto multi-cultural, but operates within white norms. These norms create obvious problems. The virtue and ethos of the alluring white woman, meek and demure, is the embodiment of Madonna, Saint Mary. No matter how far back we go, all forms of Western Christianity retain some of their Catholic mindsets, no matter the disguise they wear. My Christian context, and perhaps yours, typifies a woman of God that is exclusive to a created culture, white. I watch black men, God-fearing black men, look towards golden hair.  When we nuance the cultural practices of Southern White Christian women, we can observe girls being trained to orient their success and identity on securing a husband. These are God-honoring women whose culture (Southern Christian) has oriented them towards finding a husband, from the time they were girls. My brothers, high off feeling like a prize in a world which considers them trash, find security and value in porcelain arms at an alarming rate. This is not just a reconciling of America but a further exercise of upholding and believing in a white standard.

One of the reasons I did not think I would be able to marry a black wife was because I did not want to be “unequally yoked.” The yoke is a tool used to pair two of the same animals together. The two animals work side by side, typically to pull a plow. The term "unequal yoke" is a metaphor for being paired with someone who has a different level of perceived commitment to God. The usage of this phrase is typically reserved for romantic relationships which one person seems more devout than the other. This practice was frowned upon and denounced, in my context. It was thought to be unwise or foolish.

Unfortunately, due to the Christian context I was in, spiritual maturity hinged on observed behaviors. If I saw a woman demonstrating Godly behaviors then she was deemed to be a woman of God. If the behaviors were not demonstrated openly then the woman was not as committed to God. This was never explicitly stated but frequently implied. This seems like conventional wisdom but what makes it conventional is the normalization of cultural norms. The ideas of what makes a woman Godly are biblically based but culturally interpreted. If a woman does not fit the cultural interpretation of Godliness, then she is not. Perception is taught as reality which influences the decisions made by the men and women of the church. Among ethnicities, standards of Godliness will and should look different. But this misperception, driven by white ideals, creates caricatures of piety which disproportionately advantages white Christian women.

The overarching white perceptions of holiness combined with White women's cultural upbringing create a veil of majesty that other races cannot hope to penetrate unless they assimilate into models of whiteness.

This is not intended to be a criticism of white women. However, I am criticizing the clear cultural bias which has attempted, successfully, to enmesh itself in a bi-millennial Jewish religion. The literal whitewashing of Biblical figures in stained glass, tapestries, and paintings are a celebration of the white race. Only those with matching skin get to fully participate. So I question interracial marriages, I question interracial adoptions,I question my own beliefs of beauty and faith, because I know my perception is off

I Pledge Allegiance

If the poor and the forgotten rose up in our nation, where would I stand? If those in poverty led a successful coup d'etat against the established order, where would I stand? Would I be welcomed by the discarded of society? Would I be considered an ally, a champion of their cause? Or would I be considered an enemy? Would I be bound, dragged away, and tried for the violence I have allowed and participated in through my inaction? In either case, I would find solace in my position. However, I think I would be left alone. With no evidence on either side, I stand neither as liberator or master. I am an unknown accomplice to both sides. My allegiance is only to myself.

Honestly

I'll be honest. When I pray for my own life, I often am praying that God would help me to attain my desired reality. My personal prayers reflect a deeper truth I hold. I believe can God fix the issues of my life which I can handle. The issues which I feel are insurmountable are the prayers that often never pass from my lips. Why? I don't believe God will do anything about it because I can't do anything about it. At my core, I don't always believe prayer works. I believe prayer works, inasmuch as I can simultaneously affect my desired outcomes. I can believe God for a pay raise because I know how hard I work. However, I struggle praying for an end to Al-Qaeda because I feel powerless to do anything by my own hand to end them. As a result, I hide from the truth. I prefer not to hear news of terrorism and sex slavery because I feel empathetic towards the victims but powerless to help them. I don't always believe prayer works. I serve a God who raises the dead but I only believe he can raise my standard of living...

I am Legend

From the time I was aware of my existence, I have known I was black. As a child, I was delighted to be a part of a rich tradition of athletes, entertainers, inventors, and scholars. Only one problem, I never considered one question, what does it mean to be black?

A brief but important hisory lesson

Enslaved Africans were stripped of their cultural ties, forbidden to speak their native language and forced to convert to Christianity. Africans were treated tantamount to animals. White slave owners raped the property they claimed to care so little about. The children of these slave owners remained enslaved. These children remained in bondage for their lifetimes, where they would be worked to death, or sold, or raped again. In a society structured with race based enslavement, there was no place for a child of both slave and free status.The solution came through legislation. Children whom were born to slave mothers remained slaves, those born to free women remained free. A convenient solution, male owners did not need to be responsible for their actions while continuing to grow their workforce through raping their perceived property. All the while miscegenation continues in reality, but legally the biracial children were African slaves. This is the creation of the mixed race.

African-Americans have been bi-racial, tri-racial, and poly-racial for centuries. However, we were not able to recognize our heritage due to our legal status in antiquity. Now, I'm 25 years old and have recognized that my blacknessis a legend, a blend of fact and fiction. I am an african-american but also so much more. Who or what am I fully? That knowledge along with my people was stolen.

"Ruthless"

Taken too many shots, maybe I should be immune to these feelings.

Instead, I'm left with deferred dreams of my risen King.

I can only imagine, what I never thought I would.

Us, mentally stammering with excuses.

Truth is, we've been Ruthless.

She told Naomi wherever  you go, I'll follow.

Hollow words we repeating on Sundays,

so hollow actions are what we doing on Mondays.

Do we even care?

When did the least of these become villains in our own city?

We cover up with excuses,

"they deserve it, the government should do more, our system is broken."

No wonder the world thinks we phony, they see the cracks in our foundation.

Painting our faces with blanket statements showing just how little we really know.

Inside though, it's business as usual, "we're believing God to reach the universities, the unreached people groups, every city in the Triangle."

Pep rallies in pews.

Let's be honest,

Why do you want to reach Muslims?

Is it because they're missing out on freedom and life that only Jesus can bring?

Or is your hope that people who look different from you, can adopt your views, and be made as tools to shape the world you want to see?

I aint so simple as to miss the subliminal.

So miss me with the spiritual, talk, as a guise to justify your culture values.

I'm cool.

I only came because of Jesus.

I'm sick of the insincerity.

We were received with open arms, but our arms remain crossed to the ones who need to be allowed inside.

"Who is him?"

I was promised I would be made new not made to look just like you. I can have black skin and still be white as snow.
Guitar strings, bar chords, worship bands, white forms, unfamiliar to me.
Culture is created to seem standard.
To whom?
Rolled from the same sacrifice, cookie cutter Christianity.
I stand at the foot of the cross, but only those who look like me stand at my side.
Maybe the corporate ladder is what Jacob dreamed of?
CEO's leaving their ivory tower to help for an hour in the projects, only to ascend back to corner offices and homeschool groups.
Robed in white flesh, are they angels?
Messengers bringing tales of prosperity I've never seen, at least not for people who look like me.
So maybe, I should look more like them?
Trading Tim's and chrome rims as if they were sins for my redemption.
In exchange, I get advice on how to build 401k's and go on mission.
Now, I'm back in my neighborhood. I feel like I don't belong. David in Saul's armor, I don't fit.
Don't conform to the world but conform to these norms.
That's the subtlety in my seeker friendly service.
We're made in his image, just who is him?
The God man, our Jewish Savior, Yeshua, or the White American version?